One of the best pieces of advice a young pastor can hear is this: "It's not about you. When a church member stops attending, it more often than not has nothing to do with the pastor - so try not to take it personally."
Perhaps the larger church, as we struggle with why our overall participation is waning, could follow the same advice.
Why aren't young people coming like they used to? In all our collective hand-wringing, perhaps the best answer is one we haven't considered: It's simply not about us.
Perhaps it has nothing to do with how relevant we are, what style of worship we use, how hypocritical we might seem, or anything that has to do with us and the way we do things. Perhaps it has everything to do with how the world beyond the church has changed, and not necessarily for the worse.
Perhaps the larger church, as we struggle with why our overall participation is waning, could follow the same advice.
Why aren't young people coming like they used to? In all our collective hand-wringing, perhaps the best answer is one we haven't considered: It's simply not about us.
Perhaps it has nothing to do with how relevant we are, what style of worship we use, how hypocritical we might seem, or anything that has to do with us and the way we do things. Perhaps it has everything to do with how the world beyond the church has changed, and not necessarily for the worse.
We need to get over our ego-centrism that tells us that the church is still at the center of the culture, and that if someone doesn't go, it means they have rejected us and rejected God. We need to get past the arrogant notion that we are the only place people can find spiritual truth and community. And we need to bury the all too-common belief that people are hopelessly lost without us, that they are miserable until they stumble through our doors - especially since much of the pain and alienation in the world has been caused by us.
Instead, let us be honest about the fact that the church is not for everyone. Some folks are better off the day they walk out our doors and never come back. In today's fast-paced, high-tech, postmodern, and globalized culture, we are merely one among many options that are out there for people to find fellowship and spiritual connection, and it's time we get real about the fact that we no longer hold a monopoly. If we expect to return to 1955 levels of membership, and then look inward for explanations when we don't achieve them, we are destined for disappointment, disillusionment, and defeatism.
Perhaps, then, we shouldn't beat ourselves up because the world has changed and so has our place in it. Perhaps we should just remain true to our faith and our traditions, interpreting them for new generations with new ideas and practices the best we can.
As a young pastor, it took me several difficult years of self-doubt and second guessing before I realized that Sunday attendance was not a function of the quality of work I was doing. It was more a reflection of the changing times. My role was to be adaptive, and to shape the ministry of the church in such a way to nourish those whom we could reach. The same principles apply to the larger church.
So the next time we are tempted to get down about slumping statistics, let us remember that sage advice. "It's not about us." And let us witness to the love and grace of Christ with a little more joy, and a little less despair.
Instead, let us be honest about the fact that the church is not for everyone. Some folks are better off the day they walk out our doors and never come back. In today's fast-paced, high-tech, postmodern, and globalized culture, we are merely one among many options that are out there for people to find fellowship and spiritual connection, and it's time we get real about the fact that we no longer hold a monopoly. If we expect to return to 1955 levels of membership, and then look inward for explanations when we don't achieve them, we are destined for disappointment, disillusionment, and defeatism.
Perhaps, then, we shouldn't beat ourselves up because the world has changed and so has our place in it. Perhaps we should just remain true to our faith and our traditions, interpreting them for new generations with new ideas and practices the best we can.
As a young pastor, it took me several difficult years of self-doubt and second guessing before I realized that Sunday attendance was not a function of the quality of work I was doing. It was more a reflection of the changing times. My role was to be adaptive, and to shape the ministry of the church in such a way to nourish those whom we could reach. The same principles apply to the larger church.
So the next time we are tempted to get down about slumping statistics, let us remember that sage advice. "It's not about us." And let us witness to the love and grace of Christ with a little more joy, and a little less despair.
12 comments:
Thank you for this. I agree completely. I keep hearing in my congregation "attendance is down", and yet if I look at the annual statistics in the office and compare those with the funeral register, guess what? Attendance is down because people have died. The ones who are still living are there. The young ones, not so much, but it isn't about us - at least, not entirely. Some of it is.
But individual clergy have to keep that in mind when dealing with some members of the congregation, who might stop attending. They will say it's about the minister, and what the minister has or has not done - more often it's about crisis in their own lives, and the minister is just a handy target and a good excuse. We need to grow thicker skins all around.
It's often the congregation. The congregation is just not your peer group. Right now, the church I've attended for a long time is mostly ethnic (Filipino) seniors and I have nothing in common with them. I love the pastor and that is why I have not left but fellowship is just not available and the groups that meet are not what would work for me.
I have to disagree with the notion that declining church attendance is not a crisis.
We, as the church, need to realize that the biggest reason that we lose numbers is not the Pastor or the message, as much as it is the way it is communicated. We need to look at the churches that are growing and ask, "What are they doing that we are not?"
Our Pastor at LifePoint Church in Wilmington, N Carolina has been teaching what he sees in a growing church. This is a 3 part study that we have had two parts so far, and we are looking at what a "Church" should be. It is going to be a 25 point lesson in what a church needs to be to grow.
If you would like a lesson in "Growing a Church" and why, go to www.Lifepointnow.com and watch the current series. It is really an eye opener.
Our church started 6 years ago in a school auditorium. We are now in our own building which seats 400+ per service, and we are presently packing 3 services a week. We are looking to expand our outreach with two more services a week, because we are out of room.
Yes. It is not about us, but it is about them. We need to attract the young and keep them coming so our church survives. We, the senior members, need to realize it is not about us, it is about God and having a Christ centered Church that makes people want to attend.
RE: Anon from Wilmington, NC and Lifepoint
I lived in Wilmington for a while as well until recently and worked at a mainline church in the area. I would venture to say that churches like LifePoint and Port City Community Church (another similar congregation in the area that is not tied to a particular denomination) are not so much growing the faith in numbers as moving people from the mainlines to their own congregations. This is not a bad thing, and the folks at Lifepoint and PCCC are certainly faithful Christians who are sincere. My point is that the overall number of people who call themselves Christians in North America is dropping (despite some congregations that may seem to be growning the faith) and I think this is what the author of the blog is telling us to wrestle with and to be at peace with.
attracting is what flypaper used to do with houseflies
To think people are OK if they walk through the woods instead of belonging to a church is not only naïve, but unbiblical. God does not call us to "make a decision" for him and then go live off however you want. You are brought into the family of faith, where fellowship is not just nice, but essential for growth and health in Christ. In our society, you certainly can find a community of faith that will appeal to you, if you think your personal wants are so important, but I don't think you can just forsake the gathering of believers. - Ed
Thank you for your post. You have obviously been thinking deeply about this issue. I agree with much of what you wrote. I want to encourage you to think even more deeply about some of your assertions. While it is true that mainline Christianity in America is in a state of decline, this is no reason to lose hope. Christ calls us to remain faithful to him even in the midst of darkness. We are called to be faithful rather than successful. There are bright spots on the landscape of Christianity all across America. The only statement you made with which I found myself disagreeing strongly was your comment that "much of the pain and alienation in the world has been cause by us." This is what the world wants us to believe, but it is far from true. At some point we need to stop wallowing in our guilt over the church's past sins and simply move forward. The church has been responsible for far more healing than harm over the centuries, but bad news sells so that is what we hear. The church will flourish wherever and whenever it offers a deeply personal relationship with Jesus to people as an alternative to the claims of our culture. Then we need to step back and let the Holy Spirit take over, drawing us together into fellowship with God in Christ and one another.
This blog is wrong on almost every front. The last time I checked, the church is the body of Christ, the flock of those who belong in faith to the incarnate and risen Son of God. If history is correct and Jesus is who He says He is and He did what the Bible says He did, He is the central figure of human history and the sole pathway to salvation. Our commission - the Great Commission - is to present this reality to the world. We are to go to all the world making disciples who obey His commands, and baptize them to be members of this body, the Church. We can't control the numbers of who responds and joins this movement, but if the gospel story correctly presented to each generation, it fills humanity's deepest needs, and draws them in. If positive responses to the message of God's love and salvation are in decline, it is because the world is currently better at presenting its deceptive empty lies (like walking in the woods is better for some folks than joining with the body of believers in the presence of God, or that the church is the cause of the world's alienation) than the church is in presenting the living presence of the risen Lord. In fact if the church is in decline, maybe it is because the church is now presenting the world's lies more than biblical truth. It is true we are no longer at the center of the culture, but we do have the only message that can satisfy humanity's deepest spiritual need - a life-giving relationship with our Creator. It is likewise true that when someone quits attending worship it is often not the pastor's fault. But it is a symptom that something spiritual is going on in the person's life, and needs to be addressed. So we must be very diligent about the care of people's souls. None of this is about the "quality" of our work - that is a professional way to assess a spiritual endeavor. But it is about our creativity, passion, and faithfulness to our Lord. That's why unsophisticated country and non-denominational churches are running the former mainline denominations into the ground. They still live by the Great Commission. The writer of this blog, along with the PCUSA and the former mainline church, have moved from the Great Commission to the Great Capitulation.
Amen! And thank you for your post.
I know the where two or more have gathered, Jesus is among them. Community can be 2, 12, 25, 50 or more. And in the company I find in my heart with our creator, two of us is enough. Can we BE Christ to others? Sure!
I have to wholeheartedly disagree with this post. It is about everyone who calls themselves a Christian.
You can use all the words you want, debate and argue theology all you want but until Christianity returns to a "stop talking and go do because we care about each other and other people" mentality, Christianity will continue to die.
People don't have a problem with Jesus. It is the Christians people don't like, and why most leave or never even start attending a church.
Being a Christian means being a servant, reaching out to people, building relationships and helping those in need. When Christians stops talking and actually starts loving others with the intention of being of service to others - then Christianity will survive, thrive and prosper.
"Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’" [Matthew 25:37-40]
Dear Jim
I truly appreciate your honesty! I had to leave church to find our sweet Lord Jesus. Now that I am free in Him I will go back whenever He tells me to wherever He tells me to go! It is for freedom that Christ has set us free, dear one, freedom from our endless striving to win His love and acceptance.
Blessings XX
Mia
Post a Comment