5 Reasons Churches Should Be Cautious About Online Interactions

1) There Is No Virtual Equivalent For A Good Hug

2) It’s More Difficult To Understand Emotions And Communicate Empathy Through An Online Conversation

A sign at a local pharmacy cautions customers against using online prescription services, claiming that being able to physically see the person helps a pharmacist make a judgment. The same principle applies to pastors and online interaction.

For example: If a church member sends me a quick email and says, “I just found out that my father has died. I’m doing OK, and there’s a lot to take care of. I’ll call you when I get back from the funeral.” – I might take it at face value and not give a visit. Or, I might understand that seeing her face-to-face will reveal much more about her emotional state. In my experience, that visit is greatly needed and appreciated. Digital communication might enhance the process of pastoral care, but it is impossible to show the proper level of concern and empathy for a grieving person solely through the Internet.

3) Online Messages Can Be Misunderstood

A quick email or tweet is sent off, intended as a joke or an innocent observation – but the other person suddenly goes silent, or even shoots back an angry response. He or she is offended, because what is read and understood is much different than what the writer intended. Online, there is no such thing as tone, body language, or facial expression – things which help communicate much of what we say face-to-face.

Often, it takes a face-to-face conversation to repair the damage. In the case of delicate pastoral work, where the person might be hurt or angry to begin with, this kind of misunderstanding might never be resolved.

4) The Digital Divide Has The Potential To Exclude

For a variety of reasons – age, economic status, or personal preference – many people in the United States still do not use the Internet. Even if a church is careful to balance online and traditional communication, those who are not active participants in the digital universe can easily feel left behind.

For example: After a recent meeting, several committee members gathered in a circle with their I-phones, Droids, and Blackberries – making plans to share their ideas through Facebook. One woman, who confessed that she has a computer at home but rarely uses it, sat sadly in the corner – unable to even understand their conversation. Even though she had access to all official communication from the church and the committee chair – which was still being done with paper and ink - she was excluded from the interaction that was the driving force behind the group.

5) We Don’t Yet Understand The Theological Implications

This is the Biblical side of the new reality that will need much careful thought in the coming decades. Consider the Call of Abram in Genesis 12 that leads him to “the land that I will show you.” The Hebrew word for land refers directly to the earth, to the soil that is tilled. This means that the Covenant upon which the entire Biblical story depends is rooted in a physical place. What does this story – and what do many others from the Bible that speak to the importance of physical location – have to tell us about the “brave new world” of the Internet that we are just beginning to build?


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